'I talk to the trees...but they don't listen to me...I talk to the stars, but they never hear me...'
Remember that song from the Broadway musical of the 60's, later made into a movie with Clint Eastwood? It was catchy but also kookie.but so was everything in the 60's)
It was decades ago, or to be brutally honest..., a half century ago and although I am not talking to the trees I am talking to inanimate objects that used to be trees, such as the legs of my mahogany dining room table and chairs, my maple kitchen stools, oak book shelves...anything that I bump into on my way around the apartment.True, my conversation is one sided and always the same...an apology, " Oops, sorry!" Of course they don't answer me, they can't hear me, but if they could they'd probably say, "Be careful! Don't be in such a hurry! Watch where you're going...we like you, we don't want you to hurt yourself!"
Sweet, but unlike them, my mirrors were not so at all. When our condo was built in the 70's the decorators came up with the brilliant idea of installing wall mirrors in every room floor to ceiling.
And it was alright at first; generally speaking my mirrors and I had a good relationship. It was obvious that they liked me, so I in turn liked them and kept them free of dust and grime so the images were clear and sharp.
But I noticed as I got older, things began to change...they didn't like me as much, in fact they were becoming downright hostile! And today, as I stared straight at them, each one was sending me a message, and not a very tactful one; " You look like something the cat dragged in. Pick up the phone, make an appointment for a haircut, touchup...just for starters!"
I knew they were right but I did not appreciate hearing it from them and in such a rude way.
"Oh yeah," I answered, "I'll pick up the phone alright. Remember Al, my contractor? He'll be my first call tomorrow. Sooo, guys, you're all on notice...say Bye Bye."
Part Two
"Ma, what did you do?" exclaimed Debbie when she walked into my apartment..She had been away for 3 weeks while I was having the work done.
I waved my arm around, "New wallpaper, brightens the room, doesn't it?"
"I can't believe it. You did all this in just a few weeks. But why did you take all the mirrors away?"
"Not all, I kept the one in the bathroom."
"But why?"
"Y'know, " I said, in my most casual manner, "I got tired of them, wanted a new look."
" In such a rush! You never do anything that quickly." Her eyes narrowed with skepticism, boring a hole through my head, "Why" she asked again.
She knew me too well. "Come on, I put the tea on and I have those date and nut pastries that you love... tell me about your trip."
"It was great..." she began,"taking photos out of her bag,... "and your hair... you changed your style and color."
I flipped my head,"Like it?"
"Okay, what's going on?" she said, more to herself than to me.
We had our tea and talked about her trip but she was clearly distracted and just kept staring at me with a curious expression on her face.Suddenly she lit up," Mom, I get it! You're having a mid-life crisis!"
"More like three-fourths of a life crisis," I mumbled.
Debbie went on, "The mirrors, new hair style and color... Mom," her tone was softer, "you're entitled..."
It was one of the nicest things she ever said to me.
just THE END
